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Good Tuesday morning!  Here's your weekly
Dose of Dover
The only reliable source for un-common sense advice,
insights and cover-your-backside strategies that you won't be able to find anywhere else.

Take your best shot...try to put me out of a job!
How? Forward this week's newsletter to everyone in your Address Book
and with any luck, make 'em a little smarter this year.
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information posted on our award-winning website.
 
 
Tuesday, February 11, 2003:
 
Are you letting your hormones cloud your judgment and set you up for a life of emotional and financial misery? Valentine's Day is coming up this Friday and because it's the most popular day of the year for marriage proposals, you might want to do your best to avoid the emotional and financial heartache that comes with making poor choices of the heart by asking some pointed questions.

I know...asking hardball personal questions can make for an extremely uncomfortable and awkward-even unromantic-evening...but then again, divorce can be pretty uncomfortable, too...so which do you prefer?  Here's a few queries guaranteed to bring some deal-breaker issues to the surface fast:
    After we get married, will you maintain contact with past lovers?
    If we have two cars, who drives the newer one?
    When we drive together, who gets the wheel?
    Are you uncomfortable with women in high-paying jobs?
    If one of us meets with unexpected success or failure at work, how will it affect our relationship?
    Is there something about you that you hope I'll never find out?

Here's a fascinating tidbit of insight about affairs of the heart, courtesy of a study by the Diamond Cutters International trade group:
    In 1988 they polled 200 brides and asked the question: "Would you ever consider trading in your engagement ring for a bigger and better diamond?"   46% said yes...and 54% said no.
    Fifteen years later the same women were polled again; of those who said (back in 1988) that they were willing to "trade up" their diamond: 
81% are now divorced!
    Of the sentimental types who said they'd never trade their rings? 78% of those women are still married today!
 
Moral of this study? People who are "hard-wired" to upgrade their rings also may be driven to upgrade their cars, houses and eventually, their spouses!
 
Ben's Romance-Related Bottom Line?  Be willing to ask some tough questions before you commit. There are a slew of websites and books out there that will not only provide you with a list of tough questions, but tips on how to ask them. Here's some sites you may want to peruse to see if you can mine a nugget or two of insight that may save you [and your intended] future heartache:
    Attorney Larry Lipiec sells a book on his site: "I Had Dreams of a Happy House; Now I'm a Former Spouse."
    University of Minnesota researchers put together their own pre-marital inventory/checklist site: They'll charge you $30 to score your survey...but that's still a helluva lot cheaper than a consultation with a half-way decent divorce attorney.
    Take the "love-busters" questionnaire and see their test results that focus on potential bad habit landmines that could blow up a marriage.

Want your chances of succeeding in marriage to be better than your chances of ever seeing a chain of Michael Jackson Day Care Centers? Then play show and tell before you get married. Show and tell...as in everyone gets copies of their credit reports and lays their financial cards on the table early in the post-proposal/pre-marriage vows game.  Remember the five biggest factors that send people to divorce courts:
    Insecurity
        Communication
            Clash of values
                Insufficient separation from family and...
                    [you guessed it]...
money!

You'd better think twice before you call in sick next time you've gotta case of the sniffles, because it might end up costing you your job! The good news? Many employers are rewarding their employees with good health and attendance with thousands in dollars of bonuses. The bad news? Missing too much work due to illness-or at least the excuse of illness-could end up putting you on the unemployment line! Take two Tylenol and read all about it.....

It might be smarter to pay a tax preparer to file your taxes instead of biting on one of those IRS-inspired freebie programs instead! Many of you have written to tell me that you've already tried to take advantage of the IRS' assorted free e-filing programs...apparently, they're ain't all they were cracked up to be: Complaints include being charged for services you thought we going to be free, to either being too young or making too much money to qualify for free tax return prep services.  The Los Angeles Times' Kathy Kristof had a pretty good article about the 1040-related landmines and the frequent problems popping up for taxpayers trying to embrace our government's call to cyber-arms.

Ben's e-Filing Bottom Line?  It might take the IRS another (tax) year to get the bugs worked out to the point that the process is as simple as they're touting this year. You can still file electronically through any number of qualified tax preparers or your own accountant, but I doubt many of you will have the necessary patience or technical expertise to get through the process as smoothly as they're promoting.

But there's good news if you're in the 50+ bracket: AARP is providing free tax preparation services to senior tax payers on Saturdays at community centers around Southern California. To find a location near you, call 'em toll-free: (888) 227-7669 or check out their website for more information.

If you've had problems with your cell phone or other electronic devices working properly in the cold weather, here's an easy solution: Put the device under your armpit and warm 'em up for a few minutes. The cold weather impedes the LCD displays and can slash nicad and lithium battery performance by as much as 90%.  And speaking of cold batteries: That old wive's tale that I naively believed all these years? Storing batteries in your refrigerator will prolong their life. Not so, Energizer-breath...it's just a waste of shelf or drawer space in the 'fridge.

Lost any money in the stock market? Here's what you need to know to successfully sue your stock broker! Did you know that if you sue your stock broker (statistically) you've gotta 55-60% chance of winning? But beware of helpful brokers! Yours may have set you up to lose a long time ago...and you don't even realize it!
 
Make sure that you fill out all of the associated account-opening paperwork when you open your investment brokerage account. Why? Because when establishing a trading/investment account, one of the key pieces of evidence that could be used against you (if you decide to sue your broker) is that all-too-critical "Investment Preferences" information sheet. In theory, you are the one that's supposed to fill out this questionnaire: It outlines what your investing objectives are and should clearly define what your appetite for risk really is.

But here's reality for today's average neophyte investor: Most brokers will go out of their way to help you fill out all of the forms when you open your brokerage account-but before you sign off on anything, make damned sure you understand what it is that you're signing!!! Here's why:  Suppose you're retired and want to invest in conservative stuff like tax-free bonds or government securities. But instead your broker puts you into high-risk positions like hi-tech or foreign or growth stocks...or they "churn" your portfolio to generate commissions and pad their paychecks. If you correctly stated what your investment objectives were on the sign-up paperwork, your case will be much stronger and you'll vastly improve your chance of winning in the courtroom.  However: If you allowed your sleazy broker to fill out the paperwork (to fit his or her own agenda and to your disadvantage) you've really hurt your chances of fighting back and getting reparations if they lose a bunch of your investment money!

Ben's Bottom Line?  When you open any type of account-especially any type of investment account-do not sign off on the paperwork unless and until you completely understand exactly what it is you're signing! If necessary, take the forms home with you and study them on your own time. Don't sign the line under pressure just because you're sitting in someone's office.

Do you already have investment accounts open?
    - First thing tomorrow morning, call your broker and tell them you'd like a copy of your Investment Preferences paperwork faxed or mailed to you at once. Review what you agreed to when you first opened the account...I don't care if it's been 10 years or 10 days ago: Chances are pretty good you didn't know then what you know now.
    - Update your Investment Preferences! And put it on the calendar: You need to review and update this information-and make sure your broker or investments advisor clearly understands your wishes. Review this information at least once a year.

Your willingness to accept higher or lower levels of risk will change as the events and circumstances of your life changes. Just like your insurance needs will change as a result of marriage or divorce or births or deaths or job changes or financial changes....all of these things affect your appetite for risk and they ebb and flow continuously...so update this information and make a point of updating this information at least once a year.  Want more information?

The only thing worse than finding out your spouse or significant other is cheating on you is find this out right after you've spent a bunch of money on them! Just in time for Valentine's Day (and in the spirit of leveling your own playing field of the heart) review all of Ben's relationship-sobering notes and learn "How To Catch A Cheating Spouse" right here!

You know all of those old love letters and cards you refuse to throw away?  Why not put 'em to use and do a little comparitive research and confirm/debunk the use of handwriting analysis?  Bart Baggett, the founder of www.handwritinguniversity.com is one of the best when it comes to giving you the edge in the character-evaluation department.  (Check out his website and cash in on the free book offer he extended to BFD on KFI listeners.)

Do you know how to raise hell effectively?  I do!  This is one of the most popular sections of the website...because it works!  Check out the Six Steps To Effective Complaining...(and don't come whinin' to me!)

The FIVE RED FLAGS you've got to know about that'll [hopefully] help you avoid an audit from our pals at the IRS!  Before you start gathering your W-2s, you'd better not miss next week's show.  Life's lessons made a little easier, and a convenient way to listen and learn: The Benjamin Dover Show (don't forget the new start time):  5-7am (Hawaiian Time)  7-9 am (Pacific Time) 8-10 am (Mountain)  9-11 am (Central)  10 am-12 noon (Eastern)  3-5 pm (GMT)  8-10 pm (Baghdad [are they still around?] time) on KFI-AM/640, Los Angeles!


 


 
 
 

 

 

 
 

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